Perfecting the First Phone Call

We’ll cover everything you need to know about having a first phone call with someone, what you should talk about, what you should avoid talking about, and how to prepare for the phone call. You’re going to learn everything you need to know to have a successful first phone call with someone you’re interested in meeting in the future.

Considerations Before the First Phone Call

This is their first impression of you.

If you’re getting in touch with this person through a phone chat line, it is more than likely that this will be their first impression of you. This is why you should treat this phone call with lots of importance because it could set the tone for the rest of the relationship you could develop with the person you’re talking to.

Even if you’re not getting in touch with them via a chat line, and instead it’s through a dating app, it’s still important because, at most, you’ve only ever texted this person. This time they will get to listen to your voice, and how you speak says a lot about your personality and the kind of energy you have.

Make sure your phone is charged.

The worst thing that could happen is that your phone dies halfway through a great conversation, so make sure that your phone has a good amount of battery before you start a phone call. You wouldn’t want them to think that you hung up on them, especially if your phone happens to die at an inopportune time.

Make sure you have a good cell signal.

Similar to the battery situation, having a good cell signal is crucial to a successful phone call. If you have a bad signal, they won’t be able to hear you clearly, and that could be frustrating and make them not want to continue talking to you.

This probably wouldn’t ruin your chance of talking to them on the phone again, but it would cut the conversation short. If this happens, just try to make sure it doesn’t happen again the next time you talk on the phone, or else they might reconsider phone calls with you.

Control your nerves.

If you sound nervous during the first phone call, talking with you might not be so enjoyable, so try to control your nerves before hopping on that call. Take deep breaths, have a glass of water nearby, and make sure you’re conscious of the speed and volume you are speaking because it’s easy to talk too fast or not loud enough when you’re nervous.

Try to have more elaborate replies.

Short answers will not help you have a successful first phone call. Make sure when you’re replying to something he says, it’s not just answers like ‘Oh, okay’, ‘That’s interesting’, ‘Me too’, etc. Try to add to those comments as well, sharing more about yourself when you reply.

If he asks you something, return the question.

This is another great way to make sure you have solid, elaborate replies. Whenever he asks you something about yourself, return the question and ask about him.

Not only does this allow for more conversation between you and him, but it also makes him feel like you’re interested in learning more about him and not just telling him about yourself.

Don’t overdo it.

It’s important to know when it’s time to end the phone call. The benefits of not talking for hours and hours during the first phone call, even if you’re hitting it off and want to continue talking, are that you’ll leave him wanting to know more about you and wanting another phone call very soon.

Ending the conversation at a strategic point can guarantee you another phone call sooner than you imagine. It’s all about telling him enough about yourself to ensure he’s interested in you but not overdoing it, so he stays curious.

Don’t ask questions you wouldn’t like them to ask you.

Avoid things that could make the phone call annoying or stressful for the other person. For example, make sure you are somewhere where you’re not going to be interrupted and where he can hear you clearly.

It would be awkward if you were calling him from a party and he could hear all of the background noise because he might think that you’re going to get distracted or just feel like the phone call isn’t too important to you, and you especially want to avoid giving off that feeling if it’s the very first phone call.

Another big thing to avoid that could be easily forgotten is not chewing gum or anything crunchy. The other person will definitely be able to hear it, and loud chewing might be a pet peeve of theirs that you really want to avoid setting off.

What to Talk About on the First Call

1. Talk about aspirations.

Talking about your aspirations is a good way to get to know deeper things about him. It’s fun to ask lighter questions too, like the ones mentioned below, but if you’re looking for something serious and want to know if he’s worth your time, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to ask about his aspirations and goals for his future.

2. Talk about pets.

Ask him if he likes dogs or cats. If he does have any kind of pet, he’ll tell you and give you some conversation over that topic. You may even be able to bond over having the same kind of pet or share a story or memory about a pet you used to have.

3. Talk about his favorite food.

This is a good topic to touch on because if you have dates in the future, you’ll know what he likes, and he’ll probably ask the same question to find out what you like. It’s one more thing you could potentially have similar taste in, and it could even lead to taking the phone call to an actual date in person at one of the restaurants you talked about.

4. Talk about your favorite places to go for fun.

You can learn a lot about a person when you learn what they like to do for fun. You’ll be able to know if they’re into sports, if they’re more artistic, if they love music or movies, etc. What they do in their free time will tell you a lot about their personality because it’s the activity they choose to do because it brings them joy.

5. Talk about his music preferences.

Find out what his taste in music is, you can either bond over how you love the same bands and plan to go to a concert together, or you discover new music by letting him show you some of his favorite songs that you’ve never heard.

6. Talk about your day, and ask about his.

You can talk about something special or exciting that happened today or this week. Lots of conversation can come from this if there are interesting things happening in your life that you want to share.

What Not to Talk About on the First Call

1. Do not talk about past relationships.

This could be a sensitive topic, or it could inspire jealousy, and you definitely want to avoid that if it’s only the first phone call. If it would make you uncomfortable to talk about your past relationship, definitely don’t ask him about his.

2. Don’t talk about his job.

Unless he brings up the topic, don’t talk about his current job because it could make you look like you’re interested in how much he makes. Instead, ask him if he went to college or what he studied to find out what his career could be. He’ll likely share what he does, but it looks better if you didn’t ask about his job to find out.

3. Don’t talk about politics.

Politics and religion are two topics that can be touchy and controversial. Some people can get very defensive about what they believe in or their stance on a certain topic, so avoid bringing it up.

4. Don’t talk about first-date ideas.

You don’t want to sound too desperate to have a first date. That’s a topic to share after a few more conversations. If it happens to come up, that’s okay, you don’t have to avoid it at all costs, but don’t be the one to bring it up.

5. Don’t talk about your financial situation.

You might be doing great or you might not, but don’t share your financial situation. This is a topic you should share later on, once you trust this person more. You never know their true intentions, and you wouldn’t want them to decide whether to continue pursuing you or not based on your financial situation.

What you talk about during the phone call is very important, but it’s just as important that you are well prepared for the phone call as well. If your phone is running low on battery or you have a terrible phone signal, it will affect the experience the other person is having negatively. So make sure you’ve considered all of the things we mentioned before having your first phone call with him.